Hello again!

Here is another one of my reflections! :) 

Chapter 2: When Clients Die: Using Storytelling, Journaling, and Correspondence in Times of Loss

           

 The death of a client can be a very difficult process a counselor may endure. As a counselor, you establish a deep relationship with your client and allow them to share some of their darkest secrets and struggles. This creates a unique bond between the counselor and client. I think there is something so beautiful about two humans bearing their souls to each other and being able to help each other through this journey we call life. When a client passes away, this can be extremely painful for the counselor who may experience a range of emotions. This bond that you have been nurturing is suddenly gone. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to experience this as a counselor.

            I have experience working with children who are terminally ill. I have volunteered a children’s hospital for eight years and primarily worked with children diagnosed with cancer. I have found a deep passion working with these children. Many times friends or family members question why I love working with these very ill children. “That is so depressing!” they say. “How can you deal with that?” “How can you work with children who are dying?” I’ve heard all these many times. Yes I agree that at times it can be very heartbreaking to see a child suffer through chemotherapy, or suffer as they are getting a spinal tap. I can remember holding the hand of one very young child as she was undergoing a spinal tap, a very painful procedure. She held onto my hand so tightly and kept asking for more “Go-Go Juice” (what she called her pain medicine). It truly touched my heart and I became overwhelmed with empathy. Moments like this I treasure: having the privilege to be able to just be with someone, be truly present as they are enduring a difficult or painful situation.

I truly believe that I can make a difference with these children. Even if its just being a hand to hold or someone to play with to get their minds off of the pain and stress they are enduring. Despite these challenges, I still am drawn to this population. I do however have some concerns and fears. Although I have experience working with terminally ill children, I have never truly faced the really ugly parts that may occur. I have a glimpse of it, but never have seen a child die. I am concerned how I will deal with this if I have the opportunity and privilege to work with these children later in my career. I am a very emotional person. This can be both beneficial, and hinder me at times. It can be wonderful as I have a huge capacity for empathy for others, including strangers. However it can also be difficult as my emotions can sometimes get the best of me. This is something I am currently working on, learning to be self aware and control over my emotions. The chapter explained a Cherokee grandfather telling a story to his grandson. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves” (Scofield, 2005).  One wolf is the bad wolf, full of anger, sorrow, regret, guilt, lies, and hurt. The other wolf is beautiful and good, full of goodness, joy, kindness, empathy, and love. When the grandson asked which wolf will win, the grandfather explained that it is the wolf that you feed. This story resonated with me in several ways. I know I will experience a variety of emotions working with clients. Some may be good, and others may be very painful and difficult. In order to not allow the painful emotions take over, I will strive to “feed” the good emotions. I will focus on the good that I am hoping to achieve with my clients and the positive impact that I am having on my clients’ lives. 

Saying Goodbye: Pet Loss and Its Implications

Hello there :)
I had to write a reflection on this topic for one of my classes and decided to share this with you:

Saying Goodbye: Pet Loss and Its Implications

           

                    Pets can come in a variety of forms. The one thing in common with all these animals is their profound companionship and love they can give to pet owners. Pets offer a special unconditional love that so many people are longing for. The death of a pet can be absolutely devastating. Often times, a pet becomes part of the family. When a pet passes away, family members can experience incredible grief and a sense of loss.          
I have had my fair share of pets throughout the years. I had a Labrador when I was very little. Unfortunately my parents had to give her away. I was so young that I did not understand, but I remember feeling a sense of loss.  Years later we had a cat named Sammy. I was still young, but I remember how sweet he was. He was such a loving kitty and my sister and I adored him. One day we came home and discovered he escaped. We never saw him again. I can remember how heartbreaking this was, even as a young girl. I would go out into my neighborhood searching for Sammy. I remember the fear and pain I experienced knowing there were coyotes and other menacing animals outside that could hurt Sammy. But I never found him. Writing this now, makes me teary eyed. Even though it has been about fourteen or fifteen years since this happened. To me this really demonstrates how great of an impact pets can have on people’s lives. After Sammy we had two kittens, who my parents gave away before my sister and I got too attached. After those two, we adopted our poodle Molly. My beloved Molly. I can remember the day we picked her out. I had such a special relationship with Molly Mae. I grew up with Molly, taking care of her, learning responsibility and in return getting such a great companionship. Molly was always there for me. She was always so excited to see me and brightened my day whenever I was having a bad day. She was the epitome of unconditional love and loyalty. The two of us had a special bond all through elementary, middle, high school, and through the first two years of college. I missed her so much when I was away for college and was equally excited to see her when I came home for the holidays. The end of my sophomore year was a very low point for me. I was going through an incredibly painful breakup that summer and Molly began to get sick. In one week she declined tremendously and passed away. Having these two losses was extremely difficult for me. I felt enormous loss when Molly passed away. I was utterly devastated. I did not want to risk allowing myself to love again. (In both aspects, from my relationship and losing my beloved pet) To this day that was one of the darkest few months of my life as I tried to deal with these losses.           I am relieved and proud to say that I have processed these losses and can look back on them now and see myself as a much stronger person. To this day I still miss Molly, but I can smile at all the great memories we had together. I feel like this perspective can be beautiful and beneficial for people who experience loss; through the death of a loved one, or something else. It is so helpful to be able to look back fondly on the memories you created and being thankful for the opportunity to have them.  One year ago (to this week) I moved to San Antonio for graduate school, not knowing a single person. It was an incredible change for me and was lonely and difficult at many times. I decided to adopt a pet. I adopted a sweet kitty named Harley and he quickly filled the void in my heart and helped me adjust to this new chapter in my life.  Pets may come in a variety of forms, but the love and companionship they offer to us can leave a lasting impact on our hearts and minds, long after they pass.

The One Where I Graduated From Texas A&M University

Hey guys!
I can't believe it's happened. On Friday May 10th, 2013 at 9:00am I graduated from the most amazing university and became a former student of Texas A&M University. After four amazing years of incredible opportunities and experiences I graduated.

My college experience was amazing. There were so many ups and downs. I've grown so much stronger through hard times I've experienced, broken hearts, and other disappointments. But I've also had the chance to really blossom and discover my full potential. So much has changed since I was a freshman. For starters I was an Allied Health nurse wanting to become a Nurse. I took some really challenging classes my first year. I learned to push myself and realized that I can do anything I set my mind to. In the process, I changed my major and decided to follow a different career path. I've always known that I wanted to help people (specifically in a hospital/clinical setting). So I switched from Nursing to Social Work, and changed my major to Sociology. I fell in love with this subject!! I also decided to get a minor in Psychology where I took some of the most fascinating classes ever!

I also made some AMAZING friendships along the way and I am so incredibly thankful for God putting these people in my life. Its already really hard being separated from my close friends, but I know that we'll always keep in touch and that they'll always have a special place in my heart.


I became so emotional the days leading up to graduation. I was experiencing anxiety, excitement, and uncertainty (among many other emotions!). But the day finally came where I would walk the stage and get my Bachelor's degree. I'm so thankful (and proud!) that I was able to graduate with honors - Cum Laude. That made it graduation so much more meaningful. The last four years were a lot of work and took a lot of dedication. But it was all worth it.

I am so incredibly thankful to have been given the opportunity to attend such an amazing university and to have learned so much, both academia and things about life and myself. Its been a wonderful ride and I'm excited to see where life takes me now.


Here are some pictures from the day :)

Walking in. I'm the one with the aTm cap :)

Right after I walked in

My friend Tyler

Best Friend Hazzel

My amazing family - couldn't have done it without their support.

We did it! - Best friend Hazzel

My amazing mom!

My daddy!

My cap next to my new brick
Jacy Lane Adams
Class of 2013

Whoop!

Older Sister Lauren

I'm so incredibly blessed.
Now to start a new chapter of my life :)


Until next time...
xoxoxo
JacyLane

Landon Austin Concert

The other night I had the amazing opportunity to see one of my favorite singer/songwriters - Landon Austin! It was a concert benefiting a student organization here at Texas A&M that helps raise money for surgeries and other medical procedures for children around the world. When I heard that Landon was coming, I was absolutely thrilled!! It was at this really cozy coffee shop in Downtown Bryan - The Village Cafe. Really cute!
So the concert was absolutely amazing. Landon has an incredible voice!! He played a lot of songs both old and new, as well as cover songs and original songs he's written. I could not stop smiling the entire time! Afterwards he was sweet enough to meet us fans! I was so ridiculously excited! And I came prepared. I bought him a Texas A&M cap so he could remember his time in Aggieland :) I also wrote him a little card letting him know how excited and happy I was that he came to Bryan and that I'm a huge fan of his music. I think he liked both! I hope so :) 

Here are some pictures from the night!!!

Landon playing!

My friend Hazzel, Landon, and me!

Landon (with his A&M camp I gave him!), his sister Dani, and his bandmate :)

So ridicuolously excited to meet Landon!
Can you tell? lol Isn't he so handsome?!

It was an absolutely wonderful night! I'm so excited I got to hear Landon perform and MEET him! Definitely a highlight of senior year! :) Check out some of his music below!

A beautiful song Landon wrote! - Superhero

Another original song by Landon! Once in a Lifetime

Such a great night :) I hope you enjoy his music as much as I do! 

Until next time....

XOXOXO

JacyLane

Self Concept - Psychology Assignment

As you may or may not know, I'm getting my minor in Psychology. I find it one of the most fascinating subjects I've ever studied. I've loved every single PSYC class I've taken. This semester I'm in Psychology of Adjustment and we periodically have homework that requires us to dig deep and reflect on our core being, our morals, and how we view ourselves. Its a little bit challenging but I think its a great exercise. So here is a little bit from an assignment I recently did! 

Question: Describe your self-concept, the “good” and the “bad.” Particularly focus on the descriptors at the core of your self-concept. The things about you that are pretty consistent across time and situations. The things that help to define who you are as a person, and help set you apart from other people.

                 

Answer: I believe I am compassionate and caring individual. I think that I am a very emotional person. Which can be both good and bad. I wear my heart on my sleeve and do the best to let the people around me know how I feel. But on the other hand I tend to take offense or get hurt by the smallest things. I have a big heart and have always enjoyed helping others, whether it be a small thing or a bigger act of service.  I like being around the people I am closest with and from time to time get lonely if I spend long periods of time by myself. I tend to be indecisive and it usually takes me a long time to make a decision. I consistently like to have things planned out and get anxious when things are uncertain.

Question: Describe your ideal self (who you would ideally like to be) and fearful self (who you are afraid of becoming). Which aspects of your self-concept would you like to change in order to achieve your ideal self or avoid your fearful self?

Answer: Ideally I would like to be a strong confident girl who continues finding joy in every day situations. My ideal self would also include being more active and social as well as enjoying my own company. My feared self would be someone who is too dependent upon others and who lets emotions make it difficult to overcome challenges and happenings that are out of my control. In order to achieve my ideal self I will continue to embrace who I am and not let the “negative” things such as sometimes being too emotional, affect my overall self worth. I will continue to remind myself that my personality and my overall self is unique and is just the way I was created to be. 

Question: Take the Rosenberg Self-esteem Scale: http://personality-testing.info/tests/RSE.php

What was your total score? How do you generally feel about your self-concept? Positively? Negatively? In transition?

Answer: My total score was 23/30. I feel really positive about this score. There are many small things I “dislike” about myself (mostly physical, just as any twenty something girl does), but I overall I highly value myself and my accomplishments. Overall I feel pretty good about my self-concept. Like everyone, I have my faults and things I can work on, but I try to embrace who I am.

Fun stuff! I like reflecting on things like this. If you are bored/have time, you should ask yourself the same question. Who do you think you are? Who do you WANT to be? Who are you afraid of becoming? These are some deep questions yall lol! I just thought it was a really interesting assignment and felt the need to share :) 

Until next time...

XOXOXO

JacyLane

The Host

What if everything was taken from you in the blink of an eye? I just finished a really great book and I thought I would share. I had a few friends recommend this book called The Host. Interestingly enough the author is Stephanie Meyer, the author of the Twilight Series. And yes, I read all of the Twilight books and absolutely loved them. Now the movies on the other hand... haha Anyways. I decided I would give this new book a chance.

The Host is an epic story in which an alien race comes and takes over Earth and all its inhabitants. These aliens called "Souls" have come to Earth to inhabit the bodies of humans and erase their memory. Almost all the humans on Earth have been inhabited by these "Souls". Melanie Stryder is one of the remaining humans. She eventually gets caught by Seekers, the Souls hunting down the few remaining humans. A soul named Wanderer then gets implanted into Melanie. The interesting thing is that Melanie keeps fighting and her presence is very much alive, even with the Soul inhabiting her body. The book is about Melanie fighting to break free, and the relationship that develops between her and the Soul inhabiting her body.


It ended up being a really great book! I definitely recommend it. Also, it is going to be a movie this March. I'm already really looking forward to seeing it :) Check out the trailer!

Until next time,

XOXOXO

JacyLane